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Your choice !!

by Jackie

November 17, 2020

When I was 18 I had found out I was pregnant, I was scared but at the same time I was happy to be a mom. I was so happy and was wondering excited, but sadly I had a miscarriage and from that I didn’t wanna become pregnant again. I told myself I’ll want to be with someone who truly loves and actually wants a family, work issues out like grown adults. It’s been 3 years and I had found I was pregnant but I wasn’t happy. I just had got out from a relationship with a narcissist dude. I didn’t wanna tell him but everyone in my family was forcing me and I did and it was a biggest mistake of my life. He started threatening me and his mom too with taking away my baby and etc. It was to a point where I went to the hospital and had told if I continue stressing I’ll lose my baby. I was never happy or even enjoying my pregnancy. It was so toxic and unhealthy for me. I wasn’t eating , I had to pretend like if I glad to be pregnant until I made a decision that most of family didn’t approve of.

I had an abortion, I was scared and nervous. My mom would say little things that’ll make me feel like sh*t, but I chose my happiness instead. Today was my appointment and after the procedure was done I was happy and felt relieved. I did go on birth control (implant was my choice). I don’t regret it at all. When I am ready, I’ll have a baby with someone whom I love dearly,  but I hope one day my mom realizes that I am happy with the decision I did, hopefully she’ll forgive me; like how I forgive her. It’s your body and it’s your choice.

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