Worth the wait

I became pregnant at 18, not two months after graduating high school. My on and off again boyfriend and I had been using birth control methods that weren’t advised but had worked for us a.k.a. The “pull out method.” We knew our relationship would not have transcended the transition to college and he was not okay with this while I was excited for things to come. He decided to forgo our agreed on method as a means to “have me stay.” I felt controlled, I felt used, I felt stupid, I felt scared, I felt small, I felt betrayed. I did not want to be a mom. My abortion made me feel empowered, understood, strong, lucky, heard. I do not regret my abortion but keep it close the chest to avoid others’ opinions on my choices. I’m grateful I had a good and safe experience. I’m now 30 and preparing for kids in the future, my way. With a partner who truly loves me and respects me and my body.