When I have a baby one day in the future, it will be with a man who loves us, respects us, and is honest with us.

I found out two days before the pregnancy test was positive that he lied about separating from his wife (and the mother of his two kids) to get me into bed with him.

I didn’t want to be tied to a man like him for the rest of my life. I wanted to never look at him again, not co-parent a child with him. I didn’t want people to treat me as “the other woman” when I honestly did not know. And he had more power than me. He was an attractive and wealthy 35 year old banker. I was the 22 year old fresh graduate flattered he was talking to me, and was afraid to say no to him in case it ruined my career.

Most importantly, I didn’t want to bring an innocent baby into the mess. I didn’t want his two kids to look at my baby and think “you ruined our family”.  I didn’t want people to whisper about my baby being “the product of an affair” instead of celebrating them. I didn’t want my baby to be judged for what he did. I didn’t want my baby to have a man like that as their father.

When I have a baby one day in the future, it will be with a man who loves us, respects us, and is honest with us. I will have a baby to start a family, not unintentionally break one up.

I know I did the right thing for me and the baby. We both deserved better. And that’s why I don’t regret it.