Two Souls

by Leighla

February 9, 2021

I knew I was pregnant. I was avoiding taking a test because I just knew. I cannot explain how, must just be part of the magic of a woman. I knew my decision as soon as I saw that pregnancy stick. I was bawling my eyes out. I didn’t want to have to make that decision. Even though I knew in my mind what was the right thing to do for me and my life, my heart was pulling me the other way.  My boyfriend and I made the decision to have an abortion. To me, it was just as much his decision as it was mine. We are partners and this was for our life moving forward together. I do not regret it at all, I feel at peace but it will sit in my heart forever.

The day of my appointment I was strong. Stronger than I thought I could be. Confident in my decision, had my boyfriend by my side. Then they pull me aside. They tell me… there are two. Twins. I instantly started bawling my eyes out. How, why, what now. Everything they said to me after that was a blur. I still knew my decision was not going to change but I felt alone in the clinic, having to continue making that decision with the new information I had. I proceeded with my medical abortion. I am currently going through with this process and I am ok. I am ok physically, I am ok mentally. I am as ok as I can be at this time. Instead of having one soul on my shoulder with me, I now have two. I will think about their souls often and how they chose me at this time of my life.  I believe they will always be with me in spirit and that gives me peace.


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