There’s Always a Choice

by Aliya

June 10, 2019

I’m a 21 year old who has gone from having everything to nothing in a matter of days. Being homeless and pregnant (about a month or so, I had no idea at first) at the time was difficult. I was, and still am, dealing with a tough family life, and trying to figure out how to be an adult and get my life sorted out and stabalized.

I had found out I was pregnant while heading back to the homeless (domestic violence) shelter from work. I was almost there until I randomly fainted while waiting for the last bus to take me there. When I woke up, it had only been a few minutes but at the time I had no idea how long I was out for. I checked the time, called 911, and tried to get myself some help. While I was trying to explain what happened, I told the dispatcher I felt dizzy again and had to faint again. I wasn’t out for long, but when I noticed the dispatcher was still on the line, she told me she was sending an ambulance to get me. When I got to the hospital, that’s when I was told I was pregnant and what my choices were. I knew I wasn’t ready. Not emotionally, nor financially. I was terrified. I still felt like a child myself I felt a bit of regret and cried when I had heard the heartbeats and had my ultrasound, but I already knew deep down that I wouldn’t be as happy if I straight up had a kid with no plan whatsoever. And ignoring the protestors was easy. There are tons of people like myself who believe YOU have a choice. Don’t let anyone make you feel guilty when they don’t know your situation.

When I have a baby in the future, I want to be more emotionally ready than anything to be able to give the greatest amount of care I possibly can. Currently, I’m on my way to having a second abortion. I’m between 10-13 weeks pregnant (still have to see a doctor for accuracy due to my irregular periods)

Because my periods are so irregular, I can go a whole month without getting it. It’s very common for me to not have my period every few months or so.

Anyway – this will be my second abortion, and my last. Mistakes happen, and only you should be able to have a say with the choices you make. I still have a bit of regrets, but I know what’s best for me. I personally wouldn’t want to trap my kids in this present chaotic and cruel world anyway. Especially when I’m nowhere near stable enough to protect them, feed them, and etc.

Remember that our stories are ours to tell. We’d love to hear your story too!