I felt very alone upon discovering I was pregnant, I felt I couldn’t relate to anyone and that no one could relate to me. I scrambled for help in every avenue but found no respite. I called help lines, friends, I wrote posts, I joined Facebook groups and I still felt let down by those closest to me for not sharing this emotional rollercoaster with me. I knew I didn’t want kids, and that definitely in this climate it wouldn’t work, but honestly not wanting kids or a pregnancy is enough. I found myself trying to justify my reasoning as not having enough money, not being in the right mind frame and agreeing when the abortion clinic assigned to me the label of “not ready yet”, as if one day I would be ready. The reality is it’s ok to have an abortion just because I don’t want kids.
I’ve not thought about my abortion or had any negative side effects since, nor have I been having any emotional ups or downs. I’m just back to my normal self and being far more careful about preventing pregnancy. I regret telling so many people in my life about the abortion because I am frequently projected onto about how I ‘must’ be feeling – all these terrible emotions and heartbreak – but I don’t, and that’s ok. Abortion was my decision and the right one for me. My pregnancy was hard because I had no one to relate to. Open communication is paramount to the comfort and reassurance of other women going through the same woes and that’s why I’ve had to do my part and write this post. Thank you for your page, it gave me the anonymous siblings I needed.
