Such guilty relief

by Anonymous

September 14, 2021

I have two children I love dearly. My second is not even 18 months old. In December 2020 me and my partner found out we were pregnant again-my youngest 9 months at the time. We knew our family was complete, we were using condoms and tracking my cycles very close. I’m still not sure how it happened. But one thing was certain – we agreed on an abortion. It was an easy decision to make for us, but it was not taken lightly.  I took the pill days before my grandfather died from covid. Fast forward 9 months to now. September 2021 and we have just moved our family of 4 across the country. And I’m pregnant again. The moment I found out, I scheduled through planned parenthood. Our family is complete. My partner is weeks away from a vasectomy. I’m sad and embarrassed this has happened again (and so soon). And my 18 month old is pissed I’m not producing enough breast milk for her due to pregnancy hormones. I feel horrible all around. But the thought of terminating this pregnancy brings me great relief.

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