No Such Thing as the Perfect Abortion-Haver

by Laurie

July 20, 2018

I was having sex with my long-term, committed boyfriend that I saw a future with, and we were in love with each other.  The condom he had chosen was not the right size, it was too big, and it came off during sex.  We realized that it had when we were done having sex.  I kept calm and took a shower while he cried, intensely afraid of unintended pregnancy and abortion.

The next day I took the morning-after pill.  This time I was the one who used birth control designed for me not correctly: I waited to take it, making it less effective.


The only reason I wasn’t on the birth control pill was I was on an antibacterial prescription drug to prevent urinary tract infections, and my doctor had incorrectly told me that it would make the birth control pill not work.


And my boyfriend had noticed that I was ovulating before we had sex, which gave him pause.


That’s the gist of my story.  I think the average person would say: ‘You weren’t careless.  Looks like you just had a lot of bad luck.’  But even if I and my boyfriend *were* careless in this situation, so what?  We’re all human beings, and human beings are careless sometimes.  Hell, my doctor was ignorant to the complications of birth control!  I’m not the perfect abortion-haver because there is no such thing.  *Everyone* has that right, no matter how they ended up there.

Remember that our stories are ours to tell. We’d love to hear your story too!