I was in a loving, happy relationship – the first stable one I’d been in – and I was just finishing university. We probably could have figured it out, but as soon as I realized I was pregnant I called my mom and asked her to help me figure out how to get an abortion (at that time in Canada you couldn’t get the pill so I had to have the procedure booked no matter how early it was). I called on a Tuesday, she immediately booked it for Saturday.
It’s 9 years later, I’ve been with the same person ever since and we’ve been married for almost 6 years. I had another unplanned pregnancy last year that we decided to try keeping – it resulted in a missed miscarriage, and we were heartbroken. I may never be able to have my own kids, but I still have no regrets – even if that first pregnancy was the only one that could have come to fruition.
At that time, abortion wasn’t just a choice for me, it was my only option, and it was the most selfless thing I’ve ever done. I would have been a terrible parent who blamed the child for me never knowing what I could have done with my own life. If one day I have a pregnancy that works out, that child will be so fiercely loved in a way that I wouldn’t have been able to love 9 years ago. I have no regrets.
