My husband and I tried for 5 years and had 3 early miscarriages before conceiving our daughter, who we thought would be our rainbow baby, a baby born after a miscarriage/stillbirth/infant loss. We found out through our 20 week anatomy scan that a lot of things were wrong, and her health was at risk. She had IUGR and ventriculomegaly. At 21 weeks we found out via our perinatologist and pediatric cardiologist that she had a hole in her heart, a two vessel cord, and her heart was swollen. She would likely need heart surgery shortly after birth. We were referred for amniocentesis and we were crushed to find out her diagnosis: Triploidy.
Triploidy isn’t compatible with life. I had always been a fierce pro-choice advocate, but I always knew that due to my difficulties conceiving, the only way I could ever have an abortion was if my child had a lethal condition, like anencephaly. I had no idea that Triploidy even existed, because it’s so rare to have a Triploidy pregnancy continue past 20 weeks.
We only had days to choose, because our state’s cut off for abortion including termination for medical reasons is 24 weeks. We chose to have an induction of labor at 22 weeks. She passed peacefully during the second day of my induction, and was born silent on the third day. I remember everything about her, her father and I had a service for her and had her cremated. My heart aches for her every day and I recognize myself and my husband as bereaved parents. But I don’t shy away from the fact that I had an abortion. A termination for medical reasons. And a late term abortion at that. My daughter’s birth, my firstborn, is a topic that politicians debate whether or not my choice makes me a murderer. I look at it as taking my terminal child off life support.
My state banned all abortions for genetic reasons shortly after I had my baby via a late term abortion. Even though Triploidy has an extremely low reoccurrence rate, I still fear for my future pregnancies and our rights moving forward.
