I’m sorry this is long but here is my story.
In 2012, I was your typical college graduate, just starting to work and trying to find who I was when all I’ve been was a student. I was in the second year of being in an emotionally abusive and manipulative relationship when I found out I was pregnant (don’t let yourself or anyone else convince you that “the pullout method” is a good enough birth control.) I knew something was off when I started to find the taste of beer revolting. I wasn’t happy and I wasn’t sad, I was just pregnant. I’m not sure if we even had a discussion about what to do before he told his friends and I’m almost certain I had to be the one to tell his family. A couple weeks went by, and all I could think about is how I wasn’t ready- emotionally and financially- to have a baby. And to have a baby with this boy who I knew emotionally abused me and treated me horribly- I knew I couldn’t do it. So I called planned parenthood and scheduled an abortion at 10 weeks. I told him and he was mad but it was my decision.
Fast forward to that Friday at the clinic- that day of the week was reserved for abortions- and we are in the waiting room with everyone else who made the same decision as me. It wasn’t too long before my boyfriend started to call me names and manipulated me, calling me a horrible person to kill his child. He left me crying in the waiting room. I knew I was close to abandoning my decision due to his abuse but I found the courage to wait alone until it was my turn. I don’t regret having an abortion. I knew what would become of me if I had this baby at 22 and that wasn’t the life for me or my unborn child. Fast forward 2 years later and we’re still together- cause you know, gaslighting and abuse makes you question every decision and thought of leaving- I found myself pregnant again. But this time, I told myself I can do this, and I’m doing it. The birth of my daughter finally gave me the courage and confidence to leave my horrible relationship, move on to better things so I can create a better future for my self and more importantly, my daughter. It’s a decade later and I still don’t regret my abortion, and I talk about it with anyone who finds themselves in a similar situation. We are not as uncommon as you think and I stand for everyone’s right to choose.
