My 5 week 5 day abortion.

by Anonymous

December 31, 2019

I was 22 when I found out I was pregnant for the first time in my life. I’d turned 22 a few days before I took the pregnancy test. I’d been married for nearly 2 years as well (the next month would be our second year of marriage).

In July of 2018, I flew to my home state to visit my parents for a week. Before I left, I wanted to have sex with my husband. I track my very regular periods and my cycle is very consistent. On July 17, before we had sex, I failed to look at my period tracking app, and see that that was the day of my predicted ovulation. I failed. My husband and I had unprotected sex as we usually do, except I failed again when I let him finish in me…our sex was the result of one last “love” action before I flew away for a week.

The next morning, my flight departed. On our way to the airport, and while I was waiting on my plane, I was so nauseous. I thought it was the nerves/stress/excitement of going back to my parents’ house. They were also watching my cats because we couldn’t have them with us at the time so I was very excited to see everyone at my parents’ house.

On the plane, I was so nauseous as well. Never sick, just nauseous. I popped peppermint after peppermint, downing my sprite, hoping it would ease my belly. I ended up being fine. I arrived at the airport in my home state and all was well.

While I was there, I decided to extend my trip two more weeks, making my trip 3 weeks altogether. The whole time, I was nauseous on and off, but I blew it off because I’d been nauseous nearly consistently before my flight (and before the sex) due to high stress of my living situation. I’d been living with my in-laws for a few months and the stress made me nauseous daily and lose weight so I just assumed I was still stressed. My mom noticed I wasn’t eating much, as I’d sent her and my dad a shopping list of food to buy for me for my trip, and I barely touched it, because I was nauseous all the time. She later told me she suspected I was pregnant, because “moms know.”

I realized during my trip that I’d left my period cup in the other state, so my mom and I ordered me a new one, since my period was due near the end of my trip. As my departing date grew closer, as did my projected period date in my tracking app, and…no period. I told my mom it was probably late because I’m stressed about going back to my other state and leaving my cats behind again. I said I’d “take a pregnancy test that Saturday (after my 22nd birthday) if my period didn’t come, but it’ll be negative because every test I’ve taken before has been negative, because I’m probably infertile.” Because, see, I’d been having unprotected sex for 6 years by that time with numerous different partners (remaining STD and pregnancy-free so far), so I assumed I was infertile, because if I was going to get pregnant, it would have happened by now, right? Hah. I blew it off.

I returned to my other state. My husband noticed I was acting a bit off. I was VERY emotional and nauseous a lot. I took a lot of Dramamine during this time. I chalked it up to stress, and not wanting to be back there in the living situation and away from my pets. I told him my period was running late and that I intended to take a test shall it continue being late and he said okay. I bought three pregnancy tests.

That Saturday, August 11, which was four days after my 22nd birthday, I took a pregnancy test. It was one of those that shows a plus sign if pregnant. Not 30 seconds later (it tells you to wait 2 minutes), it showed it. I freaked out. I took another one, same result. I was crying. This can’t be happening to me. I took the third one, a ClearBlue digital test. Pregnant, nearly immediately. I went out and bought two more tests the same day. Both pregnant. I cried for 2 straight hours. I can’t be pregnant. I’m 22, in the middle of college, living with my in-laws, in a crazy amount of debt, and I don’t even really want kids. My husband’s first reaction when I said I’m pregnant was “abortion,” which we both agreed I’d do if I got pregnant. I was instantly terrified. I was pro choice, but not sure if I could ever get an abortion. I was scared that it would emotionally wreck me to get an abortion. Scared how I’d tell those close to me, because I am emotionally weak and I need a support system. So scared. I began looking for abortion clinics. I finally found a good one and booked my appointment for August 17, the day that I would be 5 weeks 5 days along from the exact date of conception. Which is rare, because most people don’t know the exact day they conceived.

I got a surgical abortion. Basically, they used what resembled a giant syringe, but without the needle, to “suck” it out. It felt like a strong period cramp for 5-10 seconds, and then it was done. I remember squeezing the nurse’s hand, because it hurt…I was so afraid. But then it was done. I went into the recovery room and left when I was ready, about 30 minutes later (because I was nauseous from a shot they’d given me, because I have a negative blood type).

The fall semester at my college started two days later, and I went. I didn’t bleed much from the abortion, and I wasn’t in pain at all. I realized that the abortion didn’t do anything bad. I wasn’t emotional anymore. I wasn’t nauseous anymore. It’s honestly the best thing I ever did. I had sex, didn’t want to have a baby, and I was pregnant, so I solved my problem and got an abortion. I don’t regret it at all. I have no negative feelings about it. To me, it’s just something that I did, and I like it that way. I’d do it again if I had to, but now I’m 23 and looking to get my tubes removed so I never have to get one again.

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