It’s just not time yet

by Anonymous

July 15, 2022

My boyfriend and I are in our early 20s and we already have a 19 month old daughter. I got pregnant with her when I was 19 and we currently live with my family. We are in the middle of getting our own apartment for the first time.

I noticed I got super fatigued and was becoming obsessive over food. And I took a test even though I told myself it was just pms. 3 positive pregnancy tests later I knew we couldn’t keep the baby. There is too much up in the air in life for us to have another one and I’m not mentally or emotionally ready to take on having a newborn anytime soon. We just started to feel like ourselves again outside of being mommy and daddy.

We know it’s the right decision although it hurts, but we have to think about taking care of the child we already have. It just feels like a chapter in a book getting ripped out and we will never get to read it. The what could have been.

We haven’t told anyone and I have an appointment in a couple days to get an abortion. I’m terrified. I always thought my second pregnancy would be happier. I just hope when this is over that I don’t ever have to do it again. But I’m grateful for the option.

Because of this abortion we will be able to be better parents for our daughter. And set a goal so that way the next time I see those two lines we get to cry out of joy.

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