It was necessary

by Anonymous

January 4, 2022

I found out I was pregnant a few days before my 19th birthday. I was so disappointed in myself, and felt irresponsible. The next morning I called and made an appointment to get an abortion. I was so scared that they couldn’t get me in right away. I had to wait a few weeks. Those weeks were terrible, I had to celebrate my birthday with my family and I was so exhausted on the verge of falling asleep the whole time, wearing a big sweatshirt in 90 degree weather because my boobs were huge and my belly was bigger. I just wanted it to be over.

My ex boyfriend gave me the money to get it and took off work to take me to the appointment, he also took care of me after. At the appointment, I remember having to put down emergency contacts, and not knowing who to put. I didn’t want anyone to find out. I knew having an abortion was the only way to make things right, but I still felt shame. Seeing all types of life walk in that waiting room, and the kind staff made me feel so much better. The doctor was going back and forth between states because he wants to help people who need abortions, and his state does not allow them. He answered all questions I had and assured me everything would be okay. I wanted a woman in the room and he brought the nurses performing the procedure in before I was put to sleep. There were quotes on the wall that were very fitting with how I felt. For a few weeks after, I would question my decision when I would see baby clothes and stuff in the store. But I don’t regret my decision in the slightest. My life is amazing right now, and if I had a baby it would be absolutely terrible. I don’t find my experience as deep as I would like. It’s kinda just something that happened, and I don’t feel anything overwhelming about it. It was just necessary and I am very thankful I was able to access an abortion. I don’t want to think about what my life would be like if I didn’t have one.

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