It was my choice and mine alone

by Anonymous

October 9, 2020

After I came back from my holiday, I found out that I was pregnant. I was shocked as I did everything to prevent this from happening (protection and morning after pill). I knew what the decision had to be, I was in no place to raise a child. Being mentally, physically and financially unstable, this was definitely not a good time to raise a child and not to mention that the father lives in a different country, jobless and unsure of his ‘purpose in life’ (yes, he was one of those who can’t handle adult situations). Till this day, he doesn’t know and I don’t think any good would come of me telling him as he had blocked me of every form of social media and I got the message loud and clear.

I knew this decision was something I’d have to face on my own and I accepted that. This was the right choice for me. Sometimes I do feel like the world (or god) is punishing me for this choice, as I was socialised to believe this was a crime but only those people who have experience this would understand the reasons we make these choices and I believe this decision was the right for me and mine alone.

If you are reading this and you feel like the world (god) is punishing, please don’t think that. You are not a bad person if you made this choice, you did what was right for you and no one else can experience what you felt or are feeling.

Forgive yourself <3

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