I wanted it. But wanting my baby wasn’t enough. I was the only one that cared for my baby, the only one that loved my baby already. And this was the hardest, but the best decision I had to make for mine.

When I found out I was pregnant, I was completely in denial about it. It wasn’t till I went to planned parenthood and they told me how far along I was that I was able to believe it. I had to think for a long time. And I always felt the only choice I had was to get an abortion. It was all bad timing. My bf wasn’t ready, I wasn’t ready. Even though my bf was supportive of whichever decision I made, I knew he was afraid. And I just didn’t want to affect him. Or anyone else. His family. He already had one child, and I just didn’t want to add to it. And even though for myself I couldn’t keep it, because it was all bad timing, I’m trying to work on my career, I still wish I could have. And I know one day I will feel at peace with what I did. One day. And I’ll learn to forgive myself. But regardless i know this was the best decision for my baby. I know that it was. I want my baby to live a great life. I want stability for my baby. And even though at the moment this is the biggest heartbreak I’ve ever had, I know I did the right thing. And one day it will come back to me. All women who go through this are extremely strong women. We are all strong. I know for a moment I felt weak, but I made a huge decision all on my own, and dealt with it all on my own. But I like to think it was a selfless decision. And we are all strong in our own ways.