I was 15 and in a relationship with an 18 year old. We were having sex but he said no to wearing condoms and I had no idea how to get another form of contraception then. I’d just hoped it would never happen for me. Obviously it did, and I was pregnant shortly after. I took three pregnancy tests in a row and I shut down after that with very little emotion, I just needed an abortion. I spoke to a friend who came to the doctor’s with me, where I went through a lengthy process of several appointments. There was a lot of gossip at my school about me being pregnant so this waiting period was very challenging. I couldn’t bear to even say it out loud so I denied it to anyone who asked. Then the day of my abortion finally came and I felt completely numb, like I just wanted it to be over so I could pretend it never happened. When I think back to it now I can feel how scary it was, but I couldn’t even process it then. I never told my parents about it so my then-boyfriend came with me as my adult, and left after 2 hours.
I couldn’t even utter the word abortion for years after that. Now, 8 years later, I still struggle to tell people. I felt so guilty and ashamed for so long, but now all I want to do is help and support that vulnerable girl that was me 8 years ago. I made a huge decision at such a young age with virtually no support and I not once have I regret it. I’m so proud of that.
