I have had 2 abortions

I had my first abortion when I was 18 years old. My Mom and my ex forced me to do it. That drove me into depression. I became suicidal I hated myself it took me 4 years to “recover” emotionally from that experience, I was 9 weeks pregnant. My second abortion was yesterday, I’m now 26 years old and I wanted that baby so bad! But with the covid-19, the shortage of food where I live (in Cuba) , not knowing how things will turn out cos everything keeps worsening, I decided to have an abortion. My man has a son,  I got 2 daughters and for our already born kids, we decided this was not the time to add a baby to the mix. I don’t feel as sad this time. I was 6 weeks pregnant. A part of my heart is broken but this really wasn’t the time.