I had a missed miscarriage

by Amanda in Alabama

August 26, 2020

Content Warning: termination for medical reasons

I was 36 and this was my first pregnancy. My husband and I had been on the fence about wanting children and had been married for almost 10 years. The pregnancy came as a surprise but one we were very excited about. I went in for an ultrasound at 15 weeks and found out there was no longer a heartbeat. Because my body still thought I was pregnant I had to determine how to handle it medically. I was too far along to let my body process the miscarriage on its own so I was given the choice of a D&E procedure or to be induced and go through labor and delivery. The D&E procedure would take around 15 minutes and  labor and delivery would be minimum of 12 hours but could be more than a day. It would involve me giving birth on the delivery floor with other women having normal births.

Immediately I knew I wanted a D&E which would spare me the emotional trauma of going though labor and delivery. I went home that day with a plan in place to return to the hospital in two days for the surgery. The same evening I received a call from my OBGYN telling me that the D&E procedure was no longer an option for me. The hospital was state funded and no longer performed D&E procedures because of the stringent abortion legislation introduced in Alabama the previous year. I was told the procedure was considered “taboo” because it is used for second trimester abortions. I was devastated and felt like I was being victimized for something out of my control. The next day I called my doctor back and pushed for a referral. My doctor told me she was aware of one physician a few hours away that would perform the procedure at one of the last abortion clinics in the state. The next day my husband and I drove 2 hours to the abortion clinic and I finally received the care I needed. There were protesters at the clinic that day and all I wanted to do was scream at them that my baby was already dead. The staff and doctor at the clinic were incredibly kind and compassionate to me. I was able to go home that evening and experienced a healthy recovery over the next couple of weeks. I am so thankful for the clinic and the doctor that helped me. If it wasn’t for them it would have been a much harder recovery for me both emotionally and physically. The message I want to convey is that when you remove to the right to choose it affects all women. I didn’t have a choice but my options were removed. Removing the right to have an abortion is absolutely removing healthcare and that is not OK. Something has to change because we deserve better than this.

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