I don’t regret my abortion

by Maria L.

November 13, 2020

I just heard my father in law admit to my wife that he voted for Trump, a man he says he can’t stand, because he’s pro-life. He voted for a man, knowing his daughter is gay and married to an immigrant. He doesn’t even know about my past abortion and I almost felt like screaming at him about it. I am 39 years old now and had an abortion when I was around 20 or 21. I was in college, working part-time and still living at home with my parents. I was dating a guy casually and was on birth control. First of all, I am NOT ashamed of the choice I made. I don’t regret it now nor did I regret it then. I made the personal choice to not bring a life into this world because it was something I knew I would be unable to handle at that age and in those circumstances. The guy I was dating helped me pay for the abortion. He was a good guy and supportive of my decision, but I knew I wasn’t ready to be a mother and raise a child with a guy I barely knew.

Yes, I was on birth control and I was always careful. But shit happens and my birth control failed. I am not the first nor will I be the last that this has happened to. Having autonomy over my own body and my life is my right and I don’t believe any person should be denied this right. Some people don’t have a support system or the mental or financial means to raise a child. And adoption isn’t always the answer when there are so many unwanted children going through the foster system and ending up traumatized from years of abuse or neglect. I’m tired of people choosing to vilify us for being pro-choice. Luckily, my family has always been supportive. They know about my abortion and they supported me and agreed that I made the right decision. My wife knows about it and supports me completely, as well. But I can’t tell everyone. Not because I’m ashamed, but because of the stigma it carries. And I’m just so tired of staying quiet about it anymore.

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