I did it twice and I will never regret it.

by Annie

March 13, 2019

The first time I had an abortion was July 2018. I was already nearly 6 weeks when I found out that I’m pregnant. My fiancé and I just came back from a month of holidays. We just moved in to our new place,, got a puppy, and I just enrolled to study in Uni.


I remember feeling so tired and always so sleepy and I thought I was going to get my period because I was getting cramps. My period never came so I thought “i’ll take a pregnancy test just to be sure.” My fiancé was away for a week for a work event when I did the test and as soon as I saw “Pregnant 5+” on the pregnancy test kit (I used the digital clear blue), I just cried and thought “Nope, I’m not ready for this! I don’t want this!” I knew straight away that I am not ready for a baby. I had everything planned and having a baby will change all of that! BUT when I told my fiancé, he was happy. He was sooo happy but at the same time, he’s nervous and then he realised that he was also not ready! We both cried. We had such a long discussion for a whole week. We debated whether we should keep the baby or not. There were so many times when I thought “Maybe I can still do whatever I want with the baby around!” But I also knew that my fiancé and I were not ready for it at all! I was only 24 and he’s 26. We’re both on the peak of our careers, having the best time of our lives! We just can’t be parents yet. We will be getting married soon! We have plans for the next 2-5 years that do not involve a child. We are just not ready for it and that’s enough reason for us to let go of the idea that “maybe we can make it through” to “Thank goodness there’s an option for us to get an abortion!”


I did it. The people at the clinic were so kind. They were not judgemental. They were very caring and professional. It was a smooth experience!


I was told not to eat 9 hours before the procedure. I got the surgical abortion. When I got to the clinic, I filled out all the necessary paperwork. The nurse explained the procedure. I met the anaesthesiologist and he asked if I have any allergies, my medications, etc. The nurse took me to a room where I can change in to the hospital robe then she escorted me to the operating room. The process took 5-10min. I didn’t feel any of it because of the anaesthesia. I just remember being woken up by the nurse. They gave me juice and biscuits. They called my fiancé to pick me up then I left.


The second time I did it, the process was the same. I got pregnant the second time because I stopped using NuvaRing due to the fact that it messed up my hormones really bad! It was careless of me but I thought, I already had an abortion once and I wanted this second time to be the last one so I got the Mirena after I got my second surgical abortion.


I’m thankful that I have the choice to do this! I don’t feel any guilt or regret at all. My fiancé and I have very equal thoughts about this and we both believe that what we did is the right thing. We know we’re not ready and we want to have kids when we are! We want our kids to be provided with everything they need. We want to be able to love them wholeheartedly and we can only do that if we know that we both decided we want kids and we are ready for it!


Right now, we are not. We want to enjoy our lives as a couple. We have a puppy that we love so much and she is like our child. We live such busy lives and it is much easier for us to have a pet than a child. We want to be very responsible when we become parents. That’s why we will do it in our own time.


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