Having an abortion was the right choice but the hurt and grief that comes along with it is horrible.

by Anonymous

October 9, 2020

I realised I was pregnant when I was 20, I started feeling weird, hungry all the time and had just a little spotting when I got my periods but I didn’t really get into it much, a week later whenever I peed it used to burn and hurt so I naturally thought it was Urinary infection and just kept drinking water and a week after that it got worse and I went to see the gyno still thinking it’s UTI and nothing else she asked me about my sex life and my periods and asked me to take a Urine test and a pelvic scan and I still went in thinking nothing and when I was asked to change for the pelvic scan the doctor then told me I was pregnant and I freaked out, I didn’t know who to tell , my parents, friends all I did was call the person I was with and a really good friend of mine and told them.

I cried all the way back home and wait for my friend to show up and cried even more, and I knew having a baby at this age didn’t seem right at all and decided to have an abortion, I read all about it and all about how other people went through an abortion and I was scared for my body also.

I got tablets I had to take one that day and four after 24 hours together. I didn’t feel anything when I had the first one but the next day I took the other four and an hour later I started bleeding and feeling hot and the pain started to kick in, thankfully I wasn’t going through it alone, my friend came prepared with a hot water bag and all of that, two hours later I threw up and I couldn’t even stand with the pain I went through, I kept changing my sanitary pad every 15 minutes and I threw up thrice scared that the tablets wouldn’t work, I got hot flashes even with the AC , that didn’t help at all. My partner who I was with never showed up at all and that made me feel even worse and showed up drunk at night, all I did was lie down and cry praying it would stop ,I tried sleeping as much as I could, my friend kept singing to me so I would sleep. The next day I felt better, the pain was still bad and I was exhausted. I got my report of the scan and I felt like a horrible person because I was 8 weeks pregnant and it broke my heart but I knew I made the right decision.

I continued to bleed for one whole month and I was scared wondering if my health was being affected by the tablets and I couldn’t even go to the doctor because of the Pandemic and lockdown. After a month I started to feel normal again, I still think about that day from time to time and still hurts but it gets better.

So to all the women out there it is scary, it does make you feel bad but in the end it’s your decision, you decide for yourself. Even if I didn’t have my partner with me I am so glad my friend was there for me throughout it all. So my advise tell someone you trust so you aren’t alone.

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