Fortunate & privileged to have my abortion

by Dani

November 17, 2018

When I found out I was pregnant – I wasn’t in the right space to have a kid. I had just ended a relationship with the ‘father’ for various reasons. My work sees me traveling 2 – 3 times a month at times. I wasn’t financially prepared. I didn’t even want children at the time – and I had a contraceptive implant to prevent it from happening.


Yet it still did.


My initial feelings were to terminate the pregnancy as soon as possible. But because I live in eSwatini, a country where abortion is illegal, it wasn’t so simple (as it is not simple for women in many other countries). I had to make an appointment with a clinic in South Africa, a four-hour drive across the border. I was both fortunate and privileged to be able to make the choices that I did – which is why shouting my abortion has become so important to me.


I was able to speak to friends who understood my situation and supported my choice.  I was able to research and find a safe and reputable clinic. I was able to make an appointment for a surgical abortion with sedation, so I wouldn’t feel any pain (physical or emotional). I was able to travel to South Africa for the procedure.


All throughout this process, I couldn’t help but think about how this is so different for other women and girls – especially here in eSwatini, a very religious and traditional country. How the shame of asking about options, can keep someone from taking the first step. How asking for help, ask about where to go for information and how to ensure that it is being done safely is sometimes not easily approached.  How the cost of traveling across the border into another country could keep someone from being able to make that choice. How alternatives aren’t safe – not knowing where the pills will come from, not knowing how to care for oneself following the procedure.


I don’t shy away from talking about my abortion. I believe that maybe I can help another woman find her freedom. Whether I am able to share information, my experience, accompany them if they need support or simply just listen to them work through their choice.


My abortion gave me the freedom to make a choice for how my life ends up and it can do that for so many more women.

Remember that our stories are ours to tell. We’d love to hear your story too!