1st abortion:
I was 22 , in the process of moving to another state with my then 1 year old and boom I found out I was pregnant. I called my friends screaming and crying because I was so shocked and there was no way I could have another baby right now when my child is still a baby their self. I called the clinic and cried the whole two weeks but I was very brave the day of the appointment and had my (ex) boyfriends support. I did the surgical one they put me to sleep & I woke up and it was over. I was relieved more than anything and I honestly didn’t think much about it after … it’s been a year and I didn’t even realize it was that long until
Pregnancy #2 came around in the same month that I would’ve been due with the first abortion … what a coincidence right ? I wanted this baby sooooooooo bad. But I also was on the fence because I didn’t want to do it alone. I have a now 2 year old. In a brand new state, no family or friends and baby dad didn’t live in the state either …. whew that was HARD. I thought and thought and thought. I wanted baby so much but I knew I couldn’t do it alone. Bd was super against having the baby & I felt more alone than ever. So I made the decision to get an abortion. I almost turned back and kept the baby …but I just kept imagining myself now 23 with 2 kids ( a toddler and a newborn ) I just knew that life wasn’t for me. I would be throwing away my youth to be a mother of 2, I would have been stuck 24/7 with 2 especially with no help I just kept seeing myself stressed out and regretting my decision… so I decided to terminate. Another surgical abortion .. I woke up feeling a little empty but slightly relieved that the nightmare was over … but I told myself I rather deal with this issue mentally than physically..
The last one was hurtful. Had I been in a better situation with a better support system I think I would’ve kept it but it wasn’t the right time or circumstances and I just couldn’t put myself through the heartache of doing it alone …
