My decision was not easy. I had other children already and I was not mentally in a good space to have another child. My relationship was also not in a good space. I got told “have the baby and things will get better”. But I knew having a baby would not help me or my relationship. I didn’t want to bring a baby into the world to be a bandaid. I knew it was the right decision for me but I still felt bad and still feel sad when I think about it. But I’m not ashamed.