I found out I was pregnant two days ago. My doctor came in with a smile saying it was positive. I cried with mixed emotions. I was able to schedule an ultrasound 4 hours later and that was when I truly felt pregnant. The ultrasound tech, who was also giddy, mistakenly showed me the sonogram before I could say “no.” I think that will stay in my mind forever.
I just couldn’t believe I missed all the signs beforehand. It felt surreal and I felt guilt.
After the ultrasound, I immediately scheduled my abortion for the next day. This was something my boyfriend and I had discussed before and the timing was wrong, so we did what we had to do. I wept the whole day and then some leading up to the procedure. I suppose I thought it would be easier. It is okay that it was not.
I am so thankful for a supportive partner and the staff at planned parenthood for their professionalism and for comforting me during the procedure. I am relieved now but still hold many emotions that I’m trying to work through.
