I had a surgical abortion at 16 weeks.
This was an incredibly tough decision for me. I found out I was pregnant at 8 weeks, and had decided to keep it, up until the 14 week mark. After long discussions, the father and I decided we were at no point in either of our lives to bring a child into a healthy, accommodating environment. And in those discussions, we found out that neither of us planned on having children, ever. We decided the best route was abortion, for the baby, and for us as individuals.
I had been going to my doctor’s appointments, and seen the ultrasounds. I had seen my baby on the screen, and heard its heartbeat. When I finally called the clinic, my heart was broken and I felt immense guilt, but I knew it was the right decision.
The day of the visit was long. Since I was so far along, I had a 2 day procedure, but the doctor kindly made it into a 1 day event. I was scared out of my wits, but everyone there was extremely kind, and there for me every step of the way.
The first half was dilation, where they injected lidocaine into my cervix and inserted dilation rods, to make the actual procedure go easier. Afterwards, I was cramping pretty bad, but I was given ibuprofen and a heating pad, and monitored in a recovery room for 2 hours.
When the 2 hours was up, it was time for the actual procedure. They brought me in the surgical room, where they did a mild, awake sedation with fentanyl and valium. This immediately took all the pain away that I had been experiencing. A nurse stood by me and held my hands the entire time, helping me keep my mind off of what was going on. Thanks to the sedation, I didn’t feel a thing. The procedure itself was super quick, something like 5 minutes. I was surprised when they were done.
Recovery was fast. I left after 15 minutes and went straight to get something to eat, and went out with family that afternoon.
I spent the afternoon swinging through my emotions. Relief, and bitter sadness. But all in all, I am very okay with the decision that was made.
I was scared, anxious, paranoid that I would die. But I read everyone else’s stories on here, and mustered up the courage to do it, and I am relieved that I did. I hope my story helps someone else, like everyone else’s stories helped me.
