My Parallel Life

I was 22, in an abusive relationship and not at all the kind of person I knew I could become to be the kind of Mother I want to be. Having an abortion was best for me, but I do think about it often. There are small moments every so often where I am reminded that I have a parallel life out there – a life where my baby would be turning 2 this year. When I see a young mother, when my sisters hit milestones in their current pregnancies, when I get to plan fun trips with my friends or when I make decisions about my future that I know would be so much more difficult if I had a baby to think about too. Those moments remind me that of the parallel lives, I’m living the optimal one. The healthiest one. And so, even when I feel sadness creep in, I also feel strength in my decision and I am happy for the life I get to live for myself.