Flashing back to 23

by Anonymous

March 15, 2021

My story begins at the age of 23, the same age my mom had me. A visit to my hometown for a high school reunion ended up being one of the most emotionally conflicting moments of my life. 10 days later and not one suspicion of being pregnant until an unspoken universal sign decided for me to split the cost for a pregnancy test with my roommate.

I was feeling like myself and not worried, until I saw 2 pink lines, one so faint I spent hours researching false positive pregnancy tests thinking to myself “is this really real?”. Two pregnancy tests and a urine sample at the clinic confirmed my fear. I was pregnant, about to finish my degree and far away from home.

Growing up, I believed that when people found out they were pregnant, they were filled with happiness and excitement.  Instead mine had tears, sadness, and shock run through my eyes and body. Questions flooded my mind, do I tell him? Does my state even provide abortions? Who can I trust? I had one year left of college and a whole career ahead of me.

The next morning I made the decision to schedule my abortion. To this day I do not regret my decision. However there was a period of time after my abortion I wondered, why did I make my mind up so quickly? Am I selfish? What does my future consist of that I can’t see?

Birthing and raising a child during a pandemic was not in my future. Rather I unapologetically invested in myself. I took every opportunity I could, ended up graduating top of my class and moved 6 states away for a job that allows me to change other people’s lives.

Almost 2 years later I am coping better and determined to stand up for a cause I believe strongly in. It is our choice to invest in ourselves and we should never feel ashamed for that.

Remember that our stories are ours to tell. We’d love to hear your story too!