At 15, what was I supposed to do?

by Nicole

February 21, 2019

Content Warning: ptsd

I had lost my virginity on my 15th birthday to my year-long boyfriend. The condom broke the first time I had sex. I remember the worry overcoming me, but in the back of my mind, I felt like I was okay. I thought I could get Plan B and be fine. Oh, how mistaken I was. At the time (2007), you could not purchase Plan B without an adult. Clearly, I did not want to tell my mom I needed it. So I waited for my sister-in-law to visit two days later to buy it for me. I waited too long. I was pregnant.

At 15, how could I care for a child? I was just a child myself! If I had a child, I would drop out of high school, work, and forever struggle. My child would live in poverty with an uneducated mother. He/she would have suffered greatly. I had to tell my mom. I had to face this problem head-on. When I told my mom, I had the intention of keeping the child. I expected my mom to scream and shout, but she didn’t. She just cried.

Later on, my mom sat me down to discuss the situation. She explained that she felt that an abortion would be best. I screamed at her for even using the “a” word. She calmed me down and told me that she had an abortion at 22. My mom and father just moved to the states from Canada with only a few hundred dollars in their pockets. There was no way that they could support a child. I suddenly started to realized that I wasn’t alone. Many people have unwanted pregnancies.

Next, my mom laid out the truth about school and finances with a baby. She said I would likely end up dropping out of school and working for minimum wage for the rest of my life. School has always been a priority for me. After long consideration, I realized that an abortion would be the best thing.


Downside: I have PTSD from the incident and I have been working with a therapist to overcome it.

Positive: I am now 26 years old with my masters in education. I am still in school to receive my Ph.D. I do not have any kids of my own yet, but my husband and I hope to find a sperm donor next year!


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